Missionaries

Instead of converting the lost, stay at home and ask your friends and neighbors to stop eating our health care system into bankruptcy.

Donald Trump Looks at Beautiful Women

Were the women Mr. Trump saw in a 2000 pageant less beautiful than the women of 2009? If this is true, what exactly does it mean for all of us? Is there an endpoint of beauty and sight? As he ages, does Mr. Trump ever wonder if his senses are diminishing like eyesight at the DMV? How does Mr. Trump's experience of standing next to beauty differ from Mr. Hugh Hefner or President Clinton?

Life on the Street

An older man hurries across the street into oncoming traffic. He is trying to get to the bus stop. He is not agile enough for what he is doing. Somehow he gets there. After lunch, I see him still waiting for a bus.

In a liquor store, another man slowly pays for some incidentals. He has trouble making change. He has an enlarged neck and very frail arms. A bag from the pharmacy hangs from one arm. His life is in the bag. He leaves the store and jaywalks across a busy street. A car swerves and sustains a long horn blast. The sick man waves apologetically.

A pigeon's tail feathers are stuck in a rodent glue trap. It is slowly walking down the street, occasionally trying to fly, but it can't get off the ground. A woman notices the bird's dilemma, moans, and goes to help the bird. A car brakes suddenly.

I've seen enough. I go back to work.

Kaiser Permanente

Kaiser Permanente has spent a great deal of money recently advertising on sports-talk radio -- at least the West Coast. The spokeswoman has a voice that is a strange blend cigarettes, cocktails, smoothies and the endorphins after a jog, which has something for everyone. The commercials are offbeat and clever in a cloying way. Perhaps they target the variety of "lifestyles" that are possible on the West Coast. But I have to wonder who exactly these spots are aimed at?

Judging by the roster of advertisers on sports-talk radio, the average sports fan suffers from one or more of the following maladies (some treatable at Kaiser): small dysfunctional penises, "spackle" in the colon, obesity, bankruptcy, alcohol and drug abuse, poorly behaving children, tax problems, foreclosure, baldness, etc.

Now, does Kaiser Permanente think that these people are waiting to choose a health care provider, once they file chapter eleven and fix their penises? I suggest that Kaiser rethink their advertising. The people who do not have health insurance can't afford it, therefore, Kaiser Permanente is advertising to a demographic that can't afford its product. One would think that they would know this, but maybe they don't. Is it possible that the health care industry doesn't know that uninsured people can't afford their services? Is this an ignorance equivalent to believing that there is spackle in the colon?

Cash for Clunkers (Ear Plugs)

Anyone who loves silicon earplugs knows that their lifespan is unfortunately short --they harden into unusable balls. I have been working on a non-toxic method of restoring the silicon to its original tackiness and elasticity. Earplugs need to join the list of recyclables.

Although, I can't make the claim that the landfills of America are clogged with earplugs, the restoration is in the spirit of recycling and the stewardship of resources.

Soon I will publish the procedures for earplug restoration. I believe there is good money to be made selling recycled earplugs. As more people become aware of the deep sleep and renewed dream life that earplugging offers, earplugs will be in demand.

At this blog I will soon offer (for free) what you need to know to start your own recycling business.